hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
