After last night, I could never be a politician.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
