I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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