Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
