how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize