you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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