what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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