that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
