this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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