im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
