Plan B is the new Plan A
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Randomize
