Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
