In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
