I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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