I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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