Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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