i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
