Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
