so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
