wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
