Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize