Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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