I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
this hospital has no fireball
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
