Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
