When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
