The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
