i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
