Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
