I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
