Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
