is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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