if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
