Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
