i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Randomize
