I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The struggles of a small town man whore
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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