so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
