I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
