Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize