I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
