well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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