we're chasing vodka with high fives
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
i am craving dick and cupcakes
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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