dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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