Sry I called you an 8
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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