The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Dick very happy bro
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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