he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
