is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
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