So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
