ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
stop calling my apartment porn island.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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