stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
