some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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