i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize