did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm at about main and main street
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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